Half a Year of Love: 6 Lessons From Our First Six Months of Marriage
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Whether you’re newly married, engaged, or just curious about what marriage really looks like, here are six things that have helped us in our first half-year as husband and wife.
Six months ago, we said ‘I do,’ blissfully unaware that our first half-year of marriage would be anything but smooth sailing.
Just two weeks before our wedding, we were grieving the loss of Matt’s dad. Three weeks in, we were battling the stomach flu together (talk about romance, right?).
Four months in, we got hit with life-altering news—Matt needed surgery to remove a tumor. And as we hit our six-month mark, he’s not only recovering but also making the biggest career leap of his life.
To say it’s been a whirlwind is an understatement. But through every high and low, we’ve learned some priceless lessons that have made these past six months a little easier to navigate—and we’re sharing them with you!
Expect The Unexpected
When you get married you don’t expect your vows to be tested so soon, but life has a way of throwing every curveball it can at you.
We learned pretty quickly that life doesn’t wait for you to settle in- it keeps going and you have to go with it.
Here we were recently married looking forward to enjoying our honeymoon when in reality we were navigating grief- and figuring out how the complexities of setting an estate.
Through all of the unexpected, grief, sickness, and unforeseen challenges we learned that marriage isn’t about avoiding hardships because they are going to find you no matter what. But is about learning how you can lean on each other and the importance of laughter in all of the chaos.
And no matter what life throws at you, you are on the same team.
At the end of the day, marriage isn’t always about the picture-perfect moments. It’s about holding hands in the hospital room, making tough decisions together, and choosing each other even when the road ahead feels uncertain.
6 Tips We Learned Our First Six Months of Marriage
💕Tip 1: Communication Is Everything
If there’s one piece of marriage advice I swear by, it’s this: healthy communication is the foundation of a strong marriage. Without open and honest conversations, misunderstandings can build up, leading to frustration and resentment.
Even small things—like discussing dinner plans—matter. Clear communication helps both partners stay on the same page and avoid unnecessary tension. And before you even say “I do,” it’s crucial to talk about important marriage expectations—finances, household responsibilities, and future goals.
Remember, your spouse isn’t a mind reader. Regular check-ins can help prevent miscommunication and ensure both of your needs are heard and understood.
But here’s the key: healthy communication isn’t just about talking—it’s about how you talk. Raising your voice, eye-rolling, or walking away without explanation can do more harm than good. Instead, focus on active listening, expressing your feelings calmly, and being intentional about your words.
The more you prioritize effective communication in marriage, the stronger your relationship will be. Because at the end of the day, love grows best in a space where both partners feel heard, valued, and understood.
💕 Tip 2: Teamwork Over Keeping Score
When Matt and I got married, we never viewed household duties as a competition or believed one role was more important than the other. And I truly think that mindset has made our first six months of marriage so much smoother.
Matt takes on the physically demanding jobs—working long hours in construction, handling home repairs, and keeping up with the heavy lifting (literally). But that doesn’t make his contributions more valuable than mine.
I love creating a cozy, welcoming home for him to return to after a long day. Cooking a nutritious meal and keeping things in order isn’t just about chores—it’s about caring for our home and each other.
Just because I’m not out in the trenches (so to speak) doesn’t mean my role isn’t just as meaningful. And Matt has never made me feel insignificant or less than because of it.
Whether you embrace traditional gender roles in marriage like we do, or you’re the breadwinner while your husband takes on more household duties, marriage is a partnership. Both of you bring unique strengths that make your relationship whole—because at the end of the day, a strong marriage isn’t about who does what, but how you support each other as a team.
💕 Tip 3: Prioritizing Quality Time Over Just Coexisting
Matt and I are definitely still working on this, but one of the most important things we’ve learned is that spending intentional quality time together is non-negotiable in a strong marriage. And no, I don’t just mean sitting next to each other while scrolling on your phones. 🙃
Intentional date nights and distraction-free time together can honestly make or break a relationship. Life gets busy, but setting aside time to truly connect—whether it’s a date night, a long walk, or just talking over coffee—helps keep your marriage strong.
Over the past six months, we’ve gotten so much better at making time for each other, even when life felt overwhelming. Prioritizing quality time, along with these other healthy marriage habits, has helped us grow stronger together—allowing us to face whatever challenges come our way as a team.
💕 Tip 4: Learning Each Other’s Love Languages in Real Time
Before Matt and I figured out our love languages, our communication wasn’t nearly as strong. We both felt like we were putting in effort, but somehow, our needs still weren’t being fully met. If you’re not sure what your love languages are, I highly recommend checking out this post on the 5 love languages—it even includes a free quiz so you and your spouse can find out yours!
Knowing Matt’s love language has helped me be more intentional about showing love in a way that truly speaks to him. He feels most loved through quality time and physical touch—and no, that doesn’t always mean intimacy! Simple things like cuddling on the couch or holding hands make a big impact.
On the flip side, I also love quality time, but my second highest love language is words of affirmation—meaning I feel most appreciated when I hear compliments or encouragement throughout the day.
This is where not knowing each other’s love language can cause unintentional hurt. If I only show love in my way, Matt might not feel as loved as he could. And if Matt assumes physical touch is what I need most, I could feel unseen when I really crave verbal reassurance.
Taking the time to learn and practice each other’s love languages has made such a difference in our relationship—and it’s something every couple can benefit from.
💕 Tip 5: Laughter Fixes Almost Everything
Somewhere between hospital visits, career changes, and all the stress in between, we learned that laughter truly is medicine for the soul. Whether it was deliriously cracking up while sick on the couch or joking that we should’ve asked for a marriage trial run before this rollercoaster, those little moments of humor kept us sane.
Marriage isn’t about creating a picture-perfect life—it’s about finding joy even in the chaos.
I’ll never forget Matt looking over at me while we were both sick in bed and saying, “In sickness and in health, right?” I could barely laugh without my stomach hurting, but in that moment, I realized how much humor helps us stay connected—even in the hardest times.
The important lesson? You have to laugh together. Yes, marriage is serious and should be taken seriously—but if you can’t be your goofy, unfiltered selves with each other, what’s the point? Learning to find humor in the moments where you’d usually stress out makes such a huge difference in your relationship.
At the end of the day, laughter brings you closer, reminds you not to take life too seriously, and keeps your marriage feeling light, fun, and full of love.
💕 Tip 6: Love Is a Daily Choice
If there’s one thing that has made our first six months of marriage easier—aside from being absolute best friends—it’s CHOOSING to love each other every single day.
There were moments in those first few months when things got really hard, and either one of us could’ve pulled away. When life felt overwhelming, it would have been easy to stop putting in the effort.
But here’s the thing about marriage—it’s not just about the feelings. Love isn’t just something you feel; it’s something you choose.
That honeymoon phase? Eventually, it fades. But honestly? I believe you can keep that spark alive—because it’s not about always feeling butterflies. It’s about choosing to show up for your spouse, even on the days when you’re not on the same page, even when life feels off.
You can either take the easy way out—or you can look back at your marriage vows and remind yourself why you made that promise in the first place. Love is a commitment, not just a feeling. And when you make it a daily choice, your marriage will be stronger for it.
Don’t Be Afraid To Struggle
After everything life has thrown our way, Matt and I have truly learned how to lean on each other and not be afraid to ask for help.
Marriage isn’t about handling everything alone—it’s about having a built-in best friend and support system to lift you up when you’re struggling and stand beside you when life feels overwhelming.
One of my favorite lessons from these first six months is knowing that no matter what storms come our way, I always have someone in my corner—someone who’s got my back, fights for us, and never lets me face the hard days alone. And that, to me, is one of the most beautiful parts of marriage.
Life will throw its toughest battles at you, but when you face them hand in hand, nothing can break the bond you’ve built together.
Have you ever faced unexpected challenges in marriage? What lessons did you learn? Drop them in the comments—I’d love to hear your story!
As always I hope you are surrounded by so much love and joy and wish you the best of luck whether you are engaged, just starting your marriage like us, or if you are celebrating multiple years of marriage!
Lots of Love,
Miranda💖